Class begins tomorrow!

Lots of work was accomplished today:
- Two hours of Bible study in Daniel this morning
- Hike to the top of Devils Head Trail, about a 1,000 foot climb, 1.4 mile trail that rewarded the hiker with a gorgeous view in every direction, about 4 hours walking and climbing with new friends
- Two hours preparing my first ever real lesson plan for my own real classes that will begin tomorrow!

Pikes Peak...29 air miles away from where I was standing on top of Devils Head



And somewhere behind me is my Kansas...out there, somewhere...

Solitude

"Alone, yet not alone am I,
Though in this solitude so drear;
I feel my Saviour always nigh,
He comes the very hour to cheer;
I am with Him, and He with me,
E'en here alone I cannot be."

About 5 years ago I took the Myers-Briggs personality test, and discovered that I am as extroverted as a person can possibly be, which means I have to deal with almost everything externally, talking it out, getting the opinion, or at least the listening ear, of dozens of people. It also means I need to go to people to recharge my batteries, to be sustained, if you will. People, people, people. They have always been my life. So much so, that other than enough quiet time to make me happy every now and then, I dreaded being alone (although, granted, people and stories even filled my mind when I was alone, so I wasn't even alone then, in reality).

Yet, people are not all. God is all. And in Him is the joy that comes through people as well. There have been many times in my life I have asked God to strip me of my idolatry. My idols aren't silver or gold, but living, breathing people who I allow to consume my heart and mind rather than my God. Last summer was one of those times where I begged Him to smash the idols and teach me to truly love people, and not just use them as my worship, my fulfillment, my affirmation.

That prayer opened the door to a long hard year at school in which God stripped away the people I love the most, and allowed me to respond in anger and frustration, and fall flat on my face in trying to cope. He let me wallow in selfishness for just long enough, then took even more away. When I cried to Him, He showed me that what was lacking was a true desire to love sacrificially. Love, for me, doesn't just mean giving everything to everyone - that has been my problem my whole life. Love is sacrifice, like God's love for us. He gave Himself to save me. Himself. Love, for me, means sacrificing, too, and for me that means withholding and waiting and not always giving all I want. It also means being more selfless, and I never realized how sweet and others-centered you can seem on the outside while being very self-centered within.

That realization began a building process where the stripping away process ended, for that time. There is so much joy in knowing the Lord and loving Him. That is one of the most amazing things I've been discovering lately. When you start to learn what sacrifice means in your life, and start practicing it, you find that you really aren't "sacrificing" anything, because if you are willing to let go, God comes in and fills you with more joy than you ever possessed while you clutched at your idols. And, truthfully, God restores what He takes away, often. He is working in me and my relationships and teaching me how to better love those I thought I loved well before. It's a pretty humbling process, once you start realizing how selfish you've been and how much people have been putting up with you.

I've been alone now for almost a week in Colorado, other than a few intermittent connections with people. He's given me a friend, Ruth, and some lovely people to work with in ESL teaching, and He is preparing my class of students for me, and there are a few others I'm looking forward to being with this summer, like Ryan and Amelia and Ceddy, but for once in my life I'm not somewhere because the people are holding me here. I'm here with the Lord and we are facing the summer together. It is beautiful to know Him and be known by Him. When I was out on the mountains last week, I was happier than I've been for a long, long time, and no person was there to make me happy...only my God. We've had the best time together this week. And I look forward to a lot more solitude with Him this summer...learning to love Him and delight in Him even more. He is so wonderful. I'm so thankful for all He is and all He teaches me.

La semana primero

Technically it hasn't been a whole first week in Colorado, but I arrived in Monday and here it is Friday night, so it feels like the first week has finished, even though I have yet to actually experience a Sunday morning at Littleton Bible Chapel.

This evening I had one of the best meals I've ever eaten, possibly. I took ground beef and made burgers with breadcrumbs, milk, Worchestershire sauce, and various seasonings and grilled them along with green and orange peppers. I boiled quinoa, which is a little grain kind of like a cross between millet and rice and is scrumptious. I mixed olive oil with rosemary and other spices and mixed it in with the quinoa. Then I had ice water in a crystal goblet and ate supper out on the deck under a Denver sunset, reading a book. It was so delightful. And yes, I did just use that word. :)

Tuesday I met with Betty, who is in charge of the ESL classes. We went over the curriculum and talked about the classes. I'll be in charge of the intermediate level of English classes at the church! Wow. I didn't expect that much responsibility, but it makes me super excited. Another lady will help me some, at least in the mornings. On Thursday morning we began registration for the classes. That included testing each person who came in so we could evaluate their level. That was good. About 10 ladies and one man came in. It is a challenge, discerning where people should fit into the program. For instance, one lady is very fluent speaking, but since she speaks Arabic as her primary language, her reading and writing are very weak (different alphabet). So do you put her at a level of speaking that is lower than she is? I am hoping that she can be in my class because I'd like to give her special help, perhaps by assigning special reading and writing assignments. That's my favorite part about English anyway. :) Then there are people who come in and want to learn English but are really too advanced for the classes we offer. They know that they are not as comfortable in English as they'd like to be, so they want to keep studying, but it would be useless for them to take classes that are below their level. However, I talked with Betty and she loved my idea. To these people I've been offering to tutor them on the side, outside of our classes. The Lord has given me two women already who want this, and both want to pay me. So I'll be meeting with a lovely older Brazilian woman who has an incredibly thick accent and wants to become a citizen, and a younger South Korean woman who is a dentist in Korea but doesn't work here yet because her English isn't good enough. With the second lady I'll just be meeting to talk for an hour every week so she can practice her English. What an opportunity for good relationships with these ladies. I'm excited.

Today the only place I went was to the grocery store, and the only thing I planned were my meals. And those I planned right before I ate. :) I was able to read, write, pray, watch Little House on the Prairie, walk, talk to friends long distance, play piano, etc. It has been lovely and relaxing. When I finish here I plan to spend a bit of time in Bible study and maybe Greek, and maybe talk to a couple more people on the phone. And tomorrow I'll be helping with more registration for the classes.

People kept telling me that I'm going to have a wonderful summer. So far it HAS been amazing. I laugh thinking of Ms. Brooke in Anne of Avonlea: And what is to be the pill in all of this jam, Ms. Shirley? I have no promise that the days ahead will or won't be as lovely as the past few have been, but I am so thankful for God's grace and provision this week. He's pretty amazing. My heart's longing is to just love these people who He is giving me to teach and do my best with that, and to keep up with my personal goals in reading and praying and studying. If I can look back on this summer and know I have done my best with those responsibilities, I will be thankful. God's grace is sufficient for all I desire and all He gives me to do.

Press on with joy!

PS funny fact...there are more local TV stations here in Spanish than in English. It's funny to me because there aren't a lot more evidences of a large Latino population, other than seeing many Hispanics around at the parks and stores. I guess I mean, it's not like north Broadway in Wichita, which actually reminds me of the Latin countries I've been to. Oh, I love people, and cultural differences. :) I can't wait to learn from all my English students. It's going to be quite a stretching, growing experience.

PS 2 I went hiking on Wednesday and was so ridiculously happy...kind of giddy, you might even say. :) Here are a couple of pictures. On my way back down through the mountains toward town I stopped at an art gallery tucked away in the mountains and a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant where I bought an expresso-flavored ice cream cone. It was happiness in a jar. I can't believe I'm really in Colorado and can DO things like this. :)

And so it begins...

Well, after eight very long hours of driving in extremely high winds on Monday, I made it to Littleton, CO. Praise God! I'm staying with a lovely family. We went out for dinner last night (it was their son's birthday), and they took me on the grand tour of Littleton. I got a wonderful 9 hours of sleep last night and spent the day settling in. I thought I'd post some pictures for those (aka Mom and Grandma, especially) who want to see them. :)

Colorado!



Possibly the funniest road sign I've ever seen. It was convincing enough to make me follow the signs all the way to the Point of Interest. :)



The Point of Interest was this...a tower from which you can allegedly see 6 states. I'm not sure I believe the sign...but if it hadn't been so windy, I would have gone up the tower anyway. It was that bizarre. :)



This is my bedroom. Lovely to have my own room all summer. :)





And these are the mountains you can see from an upstairs window in the house where I'm staying.



I found out this afternoon that I will be the teacher in charge of the intermediate classes morning and evening at the church. The family I'm staying with has left for a 17-day vacation starting this afternoon, so I'm kind of housesitting their big home for them while they're gone. It works out perfectly. I feel a little alone now, though...and pretty nervous...and rather excited. And I don't know where to start on anything. But it's 6:03 pm right now, so maybe I'll start with supper. :)

Quotes of the evening

Suppertime...
(discussing nicknames)
Peter (13): You can just call me Boswell

Later...
Mom: Deborah's in the bathroom so you can't brush your teeth right now
John (13): It's okay...when I can't use my toothbrush I just use my t-shirt and rub my teeth. It works.
Me: That's gross. Stop!
Peter: When I can't find my toothbrush I just use a right-angle grinder :D

Mom: We'll have to call you "Fang"
Me: "Fang Boswell" - has a nice ring to it.

And later still...
(Mom and Deborah (9) discussing a phone message Deborah gave to a neighbor lady. She wasn't really supposed to give the message - she was just repeating what she heard mom say about the situation)
Mom: What?! You said that? I hope she wasn't upset!
Deborah: Oh no, she seemed quite calm.
:) :) :)


Oh, and news of the day...my uncle Danny and his wife Heather had a baby girl today! It was supposed to be a boy, so this is a surprise. :) But baby and mommy are safe and sound so that is happy. :)

Like sister...like sister

Deborah and I had fun with the camera yesterday. She's been a joy to be with this week. I love how she's grown up. When I went to school I was just a bossy older sister and she was an annoying younger one, but now God's changed my heart toward kids and I actually realize that they are beautiful little people who need just as much love and attention as older people do, plus, Deborah has been growing up as a beautiful girl and we connect much better now than we used to. I love it a lot. She's my look-alike and my personality-alike sister. If she were 24 we could pass for twins, I'm pretty sure. But it's a good thing we're 15 years apart, because I'm not sure the world of 2010 could handle two of us at the same time.

Real Love

"Let love be genuine." Romans 12:9

This phrase has been on my mind for the past couple of months. What does it really mean to love with genuine love? Paul wrote that he could be the best speaker, the most faith-filled mountain-mover, and the most giving servant, but still not have love. That threw me when I realized what he was saying. Sometimes it's easy to look like the best Christian person around. Mostly because it's not really a sacrifice to give up or do certain things so that you have a good image.

That's because love is sacrifice. Genuine love means giving up legitimate rights in order to put others before yourself. Sometimes it's easy to give up those rights because you really like the person you're trying to love and want them to be happy. Just because it is easier to love those people doesn't mean that your love isn't genuine - it really can be. Sometimes, though, it's hard to like people because of their weaknesses, or the way their personality clashes with yours, or because they have hurt you. That's when showing genuine love is hard.

"Let us each please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. For Christ did not please himself, but as it is written, 'The reproaches of those who reproached you fell on me.'" Rom. 15:2-3

Learning to love with genuine love is part of the process of becoming like Jesus. I can't barter my way out of this one. Saying "I love you," isn't enough. I need to lay myself aside and really sacrifice for others. That includes holding my tongue, giving people space, digging in and helping out with the most menial jobs, praising people and listening to people, choosing not to do certain things because they frustrate the people I'm around, etc. And even when it's hard, God's grace is enough.

When God opens a door...

Well, I've promised to blog for the summer, so I'm starting now. I'm going to work on writing again this summer. Being in school has a way of making me forget that I have certain things I like to do besides study, teach, or talk with people. One of those things is writing. There are a few others, which I'll probably talk about at some point on this blog, but for now, suffice it to say that in this blog I don't just want to say "Today I did this and this and this..." but rather actually write stories and devotional notes. I'm not planning on having a lot of time to spend online, but I want to utilize well what I do have.

The Lord has opened wide the door for me to spend the summer in Littleton, CO. I will be living with a Christian family there and going to Littleton Bible Chapel. The church has ESL (English as a Second Language) classes as part of an outreach to the people in their community, and, since I am certified to teach ESL, from Emmaus, I'll be helping out there with the classes, getting some experience working with the believers there. God also provided a part-time landscaping job for me while I'm there, and a 2001 Honda CR-V to drive all summer. I'm pretty excited about the opportunity. Admittedly, I've been dragging my heels to leave Dubuque, because that's where I feel most settled now, with my church the Great Adventure Church, and all the people there, but since I'm not staying there for the summer, I'm glad that God has given me such a great way to spend my summer, in Colorado.

This Kansas farm girl will be living in the suburbs of Denver for the summer. It's a rather interesting concept. I'm pretty sure there won't be wheat fields or combines driving on the roads in Littleton. But recently I was in Chicago for our end-of-the-year school trip, and I was thinking about how I've always wanted to live in a city like Chicago, and it occurred to me that I can be happy wherever God sends me, because life is happy and beautiful when you know the Lord, and when you choose to accept His will for you. I'll miss certain things about a Kansas summer, but I'll get to experience amazing things about a Colorado summer. Most importantly, I'll get to experience knowing the Lord more and more, because that's what life is all about. I love growing and changing and can't wait to look back in August and see how He has stretched me this summer.

God is good! Keep pressing on to know Him more!